Dutch Ovens

My mother, when I was only 4 years old and starting to notice how things are cooked, owned a set of nesting cast iron frying pans. These pan, individually were the heaviest things we owned that didn't come with their own wheels or table legs. They took a while to get hot, and required a tablespoon of oil for proper operation frying something, but once hot they would do a great job putting a sear onto some piece of meat or brown a vegetable. I became a huge fan, and spent a lot of time experimenting, as I aged and took advantage of that scientific mind which I now understand is considered borderline Aspberger's Syndrome. Ever seen Salmon Fishing In The Yemen?

To me? He seems completely normal. He says he has Aspbergers, but if that's normal to me, that probably means I have it too. This does, however, make me a better chef, thus the name of the blog. I care enough to notice the outcome and improve the recipe and method.

 

When cooking with cast iron, there are all sorts of ways to improve. Our smallest pan, an 8-inch fryer, meant that if you cooked cornbread it would come out taller than the 9-inch, which also meant you needed to bake it longer than the usual 25 minutes at 425'F. At least, you would think so. It would burn the top a slightly darker brown if you did, so to make sure it was done and yet not burned, it was a good idea to lower the temp to 400'F, or 410'F if you had a finer-tuned oven temp. Ironically, this didn't seem to need longer cooking time, and it still rose really well, despite baking powder being temp activated. The steam was hot enough, apparently. I would test with a toothpick, and serve immediately. Within minutes the egg protein would harden and don't even THINK of microwaving cornbread. The egg proteins would harden in 12 seconds and make the cornbread resemble chunks of sand, completely inedible. So eat it fresh or eat it cold, but don't ever reheat with a microwave. I learned this the hard way. Why use the cast iron pan to bake a cornbread? Well, if you coat the pan in excess corn oil, then pour the batter into the hot oil it makes a delicious crispy crust, which drastically improves the flavor. This is key to a good cornbread. If you don't do this, it is going to taste bland and slightly nasty.

 

Cornbread Recipe:

1 cup corn meal

1 cup all-purpose wheat flour

1/4 cup sugar

1 egg

1/3 cup corn oil (canola also works, but

NO olive oil and no soybean/vegetable oil)

1 tablespoon baking POWDER (not baking soda)

1 teaspoon salt

 

Preheat 8 inch diameter cast iron frying pan in oven at 410'F with 2 Tablespoons of corn oil.

Mix dry ingredient. Add wet ingredients, stir till smooth batter.

Once pan is hot, pour in batter. It should SIZZLE. Return to oven.

Bake for 25 minutes, test with toothpick. Should come out clean.

Serve immediately with butter and honey.

 

In the old days an oven temp was all dials and best guess. Some ovens were 20 degrees hotter or cooler than others. You had to learn this for yourself by observation. Lots of factors for that temp difference, like insulation, age of the heating element or how clean the gas burners were. Modern ovens are much more accurate, having actual sensors and electronics rather than a bimetal strip for a thermistor/thermostat to turn the element or gas back on. Things are easier than ever, but wives are still massively lazy, and men lose interest before getting good. Its a thing. Men or women are not better at cooking by gender, though women's noses tend to be better at smelling fine details. Being a chef is all about persistence and improvement.

 

I started learning how to cook because I wanted to help my Mom because things in the kitchen were stressful for her, and she'd only been dealing with diabetes since she was pregnant with me. That plus her ADD made it really hard for her to stick to a project like dinner. She was dingy, her own words. My mother and brother are both ADHD/ADD sufferers, but I have super-concentration which is really the opposite of ADD. This enables me to figure things out because I observe longer and harder than everyone else. This is why I went into the sciences. I'm naturally inclined to pay attention.

 

This means that even when I was 4 years old, I was able to get the exact amount of spices measured with the spoons and put them into the recipe. With my sensitive 4-year-old tongue I could taste the finished dish and whether this was a good amount for each spice. Some were really nauseating. I couldn't enjoy onions until my later teens. Before that they were a quick route to vomiting. Now I adore them. Things change. I'm not a Supertaster, and I'm allergic to raw shrimp so I can't work as a chef. Shrimp is the most commonly requested seafood item at restaurants. You either handle raw shrimp or you aren't a restaurant. Customers like them too much.

 

When I opted to learn how to make eggs that are cooked, not runny the way Dad does them, I had to learn that you need to get the pan heated to nearly smoking at Medium Heat on the dial, plus about 4 minutes of absorbing the heat into the cast iron. Only then, about 15 seconds before you dropped in the butter and followed with the scrambled eggs mixture (just eggs, no milk, no water), could you get them into the butter before it burned brown. And you had to be precise about the timing. In 30 seconds that butter was brown and would make the eggs taste burnt. I have since learned that if you put in olive oil FIRST, then butter, the butter burns at a much higher temp so you can thoroughly coat the pan for non-stick properties and then add the eggs, with a dash of soy sauce because it enhances the flavor and nobody complains, they just like them more. Soy sauce is magic.

 

I've also learned that you DO NOT put cheese on eggs until they are done cooking, because as soon as cheese goes on eggs, they stop cooking, no matter how runny they are, or how hot the pan. It is a thing. It is really annoying, and an amateur that means well can really ruin eggs this way. Sort of like cooking bacon in a pan that's too hot. Lowest heat, longer cook time, is how you get crispy bacon, which is how most people like it. Also, bacon grease is TERRIBLE for cooking eggs. The burnt portion sticks to the eggs, and the steam deglazes it, causing the eggs to get burnt meat glaze on them, making them both unsightly and taste burnt and not in a good way. Always use a fresh pan for your eggs. Bacon and eggs only go together on the serving plate.

 

Well meaning amateurs are great at destroying previously edible food. They are stunning, how they destroy ingredients through assumptions, indifference, and stupidity. It is as if they've never observed a parent cooking. And they probably haven't. Many don't bother to learn, they are so bad at it. Many can't boil water. Most turn the stove on too high and burn anything they put in the pan.

 

Actual Quote: "It says HOT, I want the food to get hot. Why is the handle melting? What is that smell? Is that burned? Does this look burned to you? Cooking sucks. Want to order some Chinese?"

 

That's how it goes with modern College Graduates. They really are STUPID. No observation skills at all. The right setting for cooking veggies? MEDIUM-LOW or LOW. Seriously. They don't take much effort to soften and release their flavor into the dish, which is what you want for a one-pot dish. Which is exactly what you want for distracted cooking. Slow food is better for the beginner. Fewer ways to make mistakes. Fast food is all about timing, and getting timing wrong ruins ingredients. Distraction = waste. Student cooks don't have the money to waste ingredients. They gotta eat their mistakes. I have eaten many mistakes, for many years. Enough to motivate me to learn how to improve. And I did. I can do the fast methods, I just don't want to. I get tastier results by taking my time and letting things simmer.

 

I can say, with some pride, that by showing my best friend That Guy(tm) and his observations of both myself, and his other best friend Radical Racer Dude(RRD)(tm) who was a professional chef (with an actual name) who cooked for money, it gave him sufficient motivation to cook for himself. That Guy(tm) is really smart. As smart as me, maybe slightly smarter. He cooks, he improves, and he's learned many techniques and dishes which satisfy while keeping his diet gluten and bean free.

 

The original pot roast, before the pressure cooker was invented, involved a cast iron pot, a pair of bricks, and a towel. You put the meat, veggies, bay leaf, cider vinegar, Wooster sauce, and some water in a pot in the oven or on the stove, and simmer at 300'F for 3-4 hours with the towel-wrapped bricks holding down the lid to increase the pressure inside, forcing the steam into the meat and softening chuck roast cartilage into delicious gelatin flavored with beef and vinegar. Hindus don't know what they're missing.

 

I see that Amazon sells the Lodge brand of cast iron. Cast iron cookware is heavy and durable. It will literally last for generations. I have some of my grandmothers cast iron. It is normally a sign that your great grandparents were pioneers, here in the West. It became popular in the new arrivals because most the local recipes for delicacies that must be presented at Church Socials required cast iron cookware to make properly. If you didn't make it properly, you get snubbed, for months or years. Because that's how church wives work. And they force their husbands to comply. Humans are a vile species, but we are what we are. In a thousand years, we might be a lot better at decency. It only took us a couple thousand years to stop nailing people to crosses for saying what a good idea it would be to be nice to each other for a change. Maybe common cooking jealousy will vanish in another thousand years?

 

In the meantime, if you are going to buy for your grandchildren, I recommend enamel coated cast iron. The cost is only slightly more, and the enamel doesn't come off just because you are cooking tomato sauce. You still have to take care of it, but it really will last. Just get the right stuff. With a lid. While most cooking gear is just an excuse to make a dish once or twice which you think is painful to do with existing tools, cast iron pots/pans will see use again and again. They even work on actual fires, though I usually recommend the ones with legs for that, and a rimmed lid to hold coals. Baking in a Dutch Oven using fire coals is expert level cooking, and requires a sensitive nose, which I have. And I'm damned good at it too. Biscuits, cakes, I have done those with fire coals. Add 20 minutes to times because the Dutch oven goes onto the fire cold and needs to warm up. And stay close. Stuff can still burn. You need to smell the start of that. These things are too heavy for backpacking. But they're great for car camping.

 

Same with African Safari hanging pots. Those cast iron pots have a bottom shaped to extract the maximum heat from open flame, like a wok with a lid. Just don't drop it in the fire, and when it boils over, the moisture falls in the fire, hissing, and sometimes burns to the bottom of the pot. Of course, like above you can seal the edges with bread dough, which raises the pressure inside and cooks the contents faster. Note the metal loop handle for hanging the pot over an open fire.

 

Cast iron cookware. It lasts longer than houses. Biscuits, cakes, breads, stews, roasts. These are easily accomplished in this sort of pot with a lid.